mental illness | Take It Easy

Today’s theme for Song Lyric Sunday, as set out by Jim in his post Mental Stability, is to play a song about mental health. I’ve written numerous times about the stigma that attach to mental illness, the names sufferers are called, and the words used to describe them, so this one is right up my street. For today, I’ve chosen to share an edited version of a post I originally wrote in July 2022, as it is right on point.

Often, things are said in a derogatory, demeaning way, which can be extremely insensitive and cause much harm and hurt. But what if they are being said by someone who loves the person they are describing, or are used as the basis for a song? Does that make it any more acceptable? Depending on the context I believe that it can be, so I am playing you a song with a story to get you thinking.

One of the more colloquial phrases that is used is the title of this piece. It was in common usage in the 18th and 19th centuries, when hatmakers used a lot of mercury nitrate in their manufacturing process, and often suffered both physical and mental ill effects as a result. Nowadays it is, I think, not particularly offensive in comparison with some other terms, perhaps as a result of being used by Lewis Carroll for a character in his novel Alice’s Adventures In Wonderland, which was published in 1865 and has been a familiar part of much childhood reading since then – including mine. He actually wrote under a pen name, his real name being Charles Dodgson, and as well as his many literary works he was known for being a poet, an inventor and a mathematician, amongst other things. The phrase has also been used as a song title. Have a listen:

Larkin Poe are sisters Rebecca and Megan Lovell, plus their band, who have developed over the years from folk-based beginnings into the roots-rock which is now their trademark. As Megan says in her introduction to the song, they wrote it about their paternal grandfather, who suffered mental health problems for many years before being diagnosed with schizophrenia, which later became dementia. These are the full lyrics:

I know what time is, time is a thief
It’ll steal into bed and rob you while you sleep
And you’ll never feel it
It pulls off the covers, and rifles through your head
Then you’ll wake to find you can’t remember what you just said…
It happens to everyone…
Just like the father of my father, time stole his mind
And I can’t forget that one-fourth of his blood is mine
I try not to worry…

Please don’t come for me
I promise I’ll be great
Just let me keep what’s mine (let me keep what’s mine)
Please don’t come for me
If you must then just please wait and let me have some time (let me have some time)
Please don’t come for me
Mind over matter (it don’t matter) when you’re as mad as a hatter

It’s hard to draw a clear distinction
Who you are, who you were
Through the looking glass, the past and future begin to blur
And no-one can blame you
Well they say the world is what you make it
You think, speak and breathe
And those rules still apply, stuck in a world of make believe
You make the best with what you’re given…

Off with her head, off with her head
Paint the roses, paint the roses

That is a powerful evocation of what you might think and feel when someone close to you is suffering. Your love for them will help you care for them, but it can also make you worry that the illness might be hereditary: “and I can’t forget that one fourth of his blood is mine, I try not to worry” is, I think, the best description of this that I know. It is a horrible thing seeing someone you love becoming ill: both of my parents suffered from dementia in their later days, and it was awful to watch. Amongst all the feelings of love and loss there does also lurk that guilt in thinking that this might happen to us, too, somewhere further down the line. The lyrics really speak to someone who has gone through this: “Please don’t come for me, I promise I’ll be great. Just let me keep what’s mine.” And the follow up “Please don’t come for me. If you must then just please wait and let me have some time.”

Rebecca and Megan wrote this song around 2011, and the video above was first shared in 2015, though the song had long been a staple of their concerts at that point, and still is. It hadn’t been included on any of their records, however, until they released a live album in September 2021 with the hybrid chamber orchestra Nu Deco Ensemble. The album is called Paint The Roses, and it spent one week at #84 in the UK Albums chart. This is the version included on it:

By way of explanation, in case you don’t know the Lewis Carroll book, one of its characters was the ‘eccentric’ Queen Of Hearts, who was given to demanding punishment for people who had upset her with the phrase “off with her head” and at one point instructs her courtiers to “paint the roses” as she feels that red is a better colour for them than white. I rather like the way the concert staging reflects this in its red background, which can’t have been accidental. In a 2022 interview for the Songfacts Podcast, Megan explained how writing the song helped her process her feelings about her family history.

My parents both loved music, and encouraged me to enjoy it too. It is good at helping people make a connection, which is one of the reasons why I share a lot of it. It also helps us understand what matters to us, and can help us work through our feelings in a way that just talking to people may not be able to do. And if a colloquial phrase can be used in a way which gets a necessary message across, I’m all for it.

See you again for Tuesday Tunes, I hope 😊