Do you ever feel like getting it all off your chest? Like having a really good rant? Yes, other forms of release are available, but ranting does have its uses. I’m a fairly mild person, so my ranting is probably akin to Dennis Healey’s description of being attacked by Geoffrey Howe: like being savaged by a dead sheep. But I feel a mild rant coming on…..

You cannot fail to have noticed the trend in recent years for people taking selfies. These vary from the ‘I’m in the toilet on a night out’ type, aka bogshots, via themed crazes (see later!) to ‘I was here’ shots in front of famous landmarks. Sadly, celebrity autograph hunting seems to have been replaced by forcing said celebrities to pose with a grinning idiot. Am I out of touch, or is this just totally and utterly stupid? It was even ‘legitimised’ two years ago – this just appeared in today’s Timehop feed: 

I’ll admit to having done this myself, last year when I went to Wimbledon with one of my daughters. And they do have their uses, for example in updating the various avatars we acquire nowadays for social media. But are we taking this too far? I don’t want to sound like an old curmudgeon, though I probably am one, but I get the feeling that the human race is displaying its moron tendencies to extremes here! I was intending to admit to my own folly and share the Wimbledon selfie with you but I can’t find it. Yes, really! Count your blessings, though! As they say, I have a great face for radio! But if I was on holiday at an historical location, is the obvious thing to turn my back on it to take a picture of myself, like this… 

You do get the bonus of two huge arses with that shot, though: hers and him.

Such has the selfie craze taken off that you can buy those little extending handles to hold your smartphone away from you to get a better shot. Twatsticks, I think they’re called. And they even make them for tablets too! I can’t wait to see what they’ll produce for the new iPad Pro: someone must be about to fill the gap in the market for a portable crane.

I mentioned crazes. Sorry, but I really don’t see the point of covering my face in cling film before taking a picture of myself. WTAF! Can anyone explain this? 

And bogshots, anyone?

A family selfie

Seek help! Quickly!

The best comment I’ve seen on selfies is this lovely video by Nina Nesbitt:

Cute, clever. And the song and video are good too! That song encapsulates everything I think is wrong about selfies: the addiction, the way they take over and can be distorted to project a desired lifestyle. But what do I know? I can’t see them dying out any time soon. As long as I can still find ones that make me laugh I suppose I’ll have to go with the flow!

I have a number of Instagram friends who post a lot of selfies, so I hope they’ll forgive this post. One in particular is beautiful so I have no trouble with her! And yes, if you find my own Instagram library there are some selfies in there. All taken as documents of historic record, of course (ahem) So, for the historic record, this is me signing off for the day